Tag Archives: Lyme Disease

Sunset Reflections

Written on the gold-speckled beaches of Coronado, San Diego
Written on the gold-speckled beaches of Coronado, San Diego

The softest sand I’ve ever felt nips between my toes

Like the downy stroke of a newborn calf

Nostrils open onto untold worlds: Salty and filled with coconut tears

I lift my soul to the sea, allowing it to thrush through my veins

Leaving markers behind, as soft whispers tend to do

I am Aphrodite with gossamer wings: Fragile but beautiful

With power burnt deep into hollow bones

Move me with your persistent trick

Your silent cry for timeless mercy

Take my hollow bones and make them your temple

So they may be fragile and weak

No more.

How to Hack Headaches Naturally (And Smell Like a York Peppermint Patty)

How to Hack Headaches Naturally (And Smell Like a York Peppermint Patty)

GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!!!

Oh, I’m sorry. Was that too loud for you? Headache got you down? I feel your pain. No, really, I actually feel your pain. A LOT. Which is why I was so thrilled to discover this super easy natural headache remedy that kicks my daily Lyme-induced headaches faster than you can say: “This is not the head you’re looking for…”

So let’s get started! Here’s what you’ll need for this delicious and 100% natural headache-busting concoction:

  1. Organic Peppermint Essential Oil. I like this one by Aura Cacia, but if you can swing the price, Young Living is by far the best essential oil company to use, as they’re therapeutic grade. DoTerra is also said to be fabulous, although I have yet to try them personally. Just starting out and don’t want to invest in top-of-the-line oils quite yet? Use code “Healthy15” for 15% off of link above!
  2. Jojoba Oil I enjoy this one by Desert Essence. Use code “Comeback10” for an additional 10% off, or check the deals section, as Vitacost is always offering great savings, and may have a better bargain!
  3. A 1/3 oz. dark glass canister to store your awesome blend. I use this one with a stainless steel rollerball applicator for ease, but you can use any dark glass container. Dark glass should always be used to protect the essential oils. Plastic should not be used, as the chemicals in it will leach into your blend, and essential oils can actually eat through plastic! This is also why any rollerball applicators should be stainless steel instead of plastic.

I’ve linked the ones I used because, hey, let’s just make life easy, right? Now that you have your supplies, find the two minutes it will take to make this super simple DIY and lets get a-mixing!

DIY Headache Blend: 

Step One: Pop out the stainless steel roller ball. Since we’re using a 1/3 oz. bottle, we’ll add 5-20 drops (3-10%) of organic Peppermint Essential Oil. It should be diluted, as it can irritate the skin if applied neat. How much you put in will depend on your preference. I actually prefer an even stronger potion than recommended, but everyone’s tolerance to essential oils is different, so start low. I can only tolerate very low doses of most other oils, so find out what your sweet spot is before wasting product (and risking skin irritation.) Want to learn more about diluting essential oils? Here is a great article on how many drops you should use for a wide variety of aromatherapy purposes!

Step Two: Fill bottle with Jojoba oil. Leave a little room at the top so the rollerball won’t cause an overflow when you insert it. I like to use Jojoba because it most closely replicates our natural sebum (oil), but you could also try Grape seed, Hemp, or Avocado. Avoid coconut, as the scent profile is too overwhelming to compliment the peppermint.

Step Three: Pop the rollerball back in and cap it. Shake, shake, shake. It also helps to dance around the room. Now uncap, breathe deeply the aromatic bouquet of minty goodness, and declare: “Headache, be-gone!” Then apply liberally to the back of your neck where the spine meets the ol’ noggin, lightly over your temples, behind your ears, over your solar plexus, and your pulse points if you desire. You can also apply some at the base of your spine. Oooh, tingly! (Tingling is normal. Do not be alarmed. Unless you didn’t listen to me and decided not to dilute the essential oil, or exceed the recommended amount. Then any skin irritation that may occur is totally on you.)

Step Four: Breathe slowly and deeply for at least ten breaths, and say: “I am calm. I am at peace. I have everything that I need.” It’s amazing how just taking a moment in a dark, quiet space to breathe into the pain can help- did you know deep breathing literally changes your brain chemistry?! No wonder yogis are so zen! Then sit back and wait for the amazing dance of the tingle-plum fairy to soothe that ache into oblivion!

Step Five: Wash your hands! For any of you who’ve ever used IcyHot and forgotten this crucial final step before rubbing your eyes, you know it is NOT fun!

And that’s it! Now that your blend is made, you can keep it with you on the go, and apply whenever your head begins to feel like a tiny Ewok is running around, bashing your noggin like a stormtrooper helmet. (RE: Final scene in Return of the Jedi.)

Enjoy! If you make this, leave me a comment on how it turns out, or take a picture and tag me on Instagram @KaitlynGGuay.

Happy Tingling! (Okay, that just sounds weird, let me try that again…)

Happy Blending! (Much better, yes?)

In The Mood for Gratitude

In The Mood for Gratitude

I have a confession to make, you guys. I… man, this is hard. Okay. Here goes. I… am not a super hero. (Pause as you gasp.) I know, I know. It was a shock to me, too. But when I got struck down 4 1/2 years ago with a horrific case of neurological Lyme Disease, I really thought that due to my penchant for healthy living and discipline, I’d be bouncing back at such a rate as to alarm and awe my doctors. How did she do it, they’d say in amazement as I came bounding into my follow-up, bright orange sneakers making me look like Barry Allen (The Flash) as I zipped to and fro.

Sidebar: Where exactly is fro? And why do I want to go there?

Anyway, spoiler alert: that didn’t happen. I’ve done everything “right” and I’m still sick. (Insert chorus of knowing voices telling me that bad things happen to good people. Worst. Platitude. Ever.) Needless to say, there was a time when I was NOT, as the title of this piece states, in the mood for gratitude. I was angry. Bitter. Crying on my couch, too exhausted to make so much as a bowl of cereal, remembering my marathon days with a “why-God-why” tempered anger. You can picture it, can’t you? Yeah. T’wasn’t pretty. But I mention it because, hey, I’m human. It was part of my grieving process. And there are still days when I find myself feeling angry and resentful that this happened to me. But then I remember that I’m not a victim. I’m a warrior. And this shiz? Is getting turned around.

You see, I can either bemoan what I don’t have, or work with what I do. And to do that, I have to make an effort to become aware of what exactly I DO have to work with. That, my friends, means gratitude. And here’s how I do it.

I use The Five-Minute Journal. A genius invention. Genius, I say! Simply put, it asks me to write down three things I’m grateful for every morning, followed by three things that would make my day great. It rounds off by asking me to write down my intention for the day. Bing, bang, boom. Fill in the blank. Five minutes or less. (There’s also a reflective section you’re meant to fill in at night, but full disclosure, I often forget to do it. Eep!) I do this before breakfast every morning, and I’ve noticed a HUGE difference in my mental/emotional health. By taking the time to recognize what I’m grateful for and what I want to prioritize that day, it eliminates so much negative (and avoidable) stress. That’s the power of setting a daily intention. It gives you focus. A path. A place to direct the warrior spirit inside of you. I’ve NEVER been able to maintain a journaling practice– (so many New Year’s resolutions foiled!)– but this gives me the structure I need. And having a set time every day is essential. Can’t eat breakfast until I do the journal. And guys? I LOVE breakfast.

So why should we start our days with getting in the mood for gratitude? Simple. It quite literally affects your brain, which in turn, affects your entire body. People who practice gratitude have better energy, more determination, and have been shown to have less physical pains than people who don’t. (For a 30-year-old like me who has Lyme-induced rheumatoid arthritis, do you think this last one’s a factor? Um. YEAH.) Oh, and it also lowers anxiety and depression by helping you sleep better. Score!

For all the science– and a witty read– check out this great article: “The Grateful Brain.” Or, you know, take my word for it.

So what are you waiting for? Get in the mood for gratitude! And for all you winners who read to the end of this article? I am grateful for YOU. Welcome to the tribe, my friend!

Here’s to you,

The Foda

** Feeling inspired? You can find The Five-Minute Journal here.

Superfood Pumpkin Muffins- Gluten and Dairy Free, High Protein, Low Glycemic (Featuring Simple Mills)

Superfood Pumpkin Muffins- Gluten and Dairy Free, High Protein, Low Glycemic (Featuring Simple Mills)

Four and a half years ago, I got smacked down with a devastating case of Lyme Disease. In order to cut down all access inflammation in my body, I made the choice to cut gluten, dairy, and sugar out of my life. (Sob!) After the first month of massive hanger issues (hungry + anger) I acclimated, and started to find new meals I really enjoyed. But there’s one time of year my hanger would always return with a vengeance, dressed to kill in shades of crumbly crust beige, creamy cheese taupe, and chocolatey brown. Yup. You guessed it. The holidays.

When you’re what I like to call a Freeling (gluten free, dairy free, sugar free) or plain old digestively challenged, finding food to enjoy during the holiday season can be rough. More often than not, you wind up sitting in front of a loaded buffet table holding back tears of longing as platters of all things fried, buttered, and sugared sit there. Taunting you. Teasing you. Singing in a high voice that oddly reminds you of Miss Piggy: “You know you want me but you just. Can’t. Have. Meeeee!” 

So what’s a Freeling to do?

Cry? Throw things? Make horribly inappropriate jokes about what you’d like to do to that hunk of gouda?

Nope. You fight fire with fire. You find something so good, so delicious, that all other entrees will flee before it, so woefully inadequate will they feel.

This Thanksgiving, when my GI issues had progressed so far that I hadn’t been able to keep down more than broth and bread for 5 months, this recipe- which amazingly enough met my extreme digestive challenges- was my fire. So here it is!

Superfood Pumpkin Muffins featuring Simple Mills 

(Gluten free, dairy free, high protein, low glycemic)

Recipe makes 12 muffins

** We follow a “heaping” philosophy in our household. So when I say 3 Tablespoons of coconut oil, what I really mean is: stick that spoon into the oil and once it looks like a tiny frosted mountain, dump ‘er in! Disclaimer: this means our recipes are never exact. But hey, cooking is supposed to be fun. So just commit and go for it!

** I’ve included links for most products, ‘cause, hey, if you’re a Freeling, your life’s already hard enough, and I want to make it as simple as possible for you. However, you should be able to find most of these items in your local health food store.

Ingredients: 

1 box of Simple Mills Pumpkin Almond Flour Muffin mix

We buy these online here in 3 packs because the price for a single box is quite overinflated online, but they’re available in many natural food stores. They also have a Pumpkin-Chocolate-Banana muffin variety pack. DROOL!

3 eggs

1 cup water

3 heaping TBSP coconut oil 

We rotate brands, but always choose one that is organic and cold-pressed. We use coconut oil to cook pretty much everything, as well as for oil-pulling and as a body oil, so these two-packs are quite handy.

1 heaping tsp pine pollen (We buy ours here from Blue Bird Botanicals)

1 heaping tsp tea pollen (Here from Blue Bird Botanicals)

1 heaping tsp maca root (Available here)

3 heaping TBSP pumpkin seed protein powder (We use this brand)

2 heaping TBSP brown rice protein powder 

We use the NutriBiotic Rice Protein Powder in Plain.

1 heaping tsp ceylon cinnamon

Totally different from cassis cinnamon, which is the type typically found in the Northeast. Yes, it makes a difference. Yes, Ceylon is way better (and way better for you.) Get. You. Some. We bought this one over a year ago, and it’s still going strong.

1 heaping tsp pumpkin pie spice

1 heaping TBSP chia seed

1 heaping TBSP organic baking cocoa

One of our favorites is by Equal Exchange. It’s organic and fair trade, which is essential when buying cocoa.

1 heaping tsp organic baking powder

Pinch of Himalayan Sea Salt 

We rotate brands, but we’re currently using this.

Directions:

  • Preheat oven to 425. (The box says 350, but we always bake our GF/DF goods at a higher temperature.)
  • Blend eggs, water, and coconut oil in a blender. (I’m sure you could also just whisk it really well, but when you have Lyme fatigue, blending is way easier.)
  • Add the rest of the ingredients. Stir well. (It will be too thick at this point to blend.)
  • Line muffin pan with unbleached muffin liners. (Be sure to get unbleached. We use these. Not only are they better for you, but they won’t stick. Bleached liners will. ‘Nough said.) Or you can skip the liners and use this sweetheart rose mold muffin tray by Nordic Ware.
  • Spray liners (or inside of mold) with a light coating of pumpkin seed oil, or any cooking spray of your choice. Since it’s hard to find in spray form, we pour pumpkin seed oil into an oil misting container.
  • Fill ‘em up with your delicious pumpkin goodness!
  • Bake for 20-25 minutes. It’s usually closer to 20 minutes for us, but since we aren’t precise with our measurements, it varies. Do the toothpick test and see if it comes out clean. Or if you perpetually don’t have toothpicks (me) use a knife. Every time we’ve made these, they are quite moist in the middle (which is what I love) so while you don’t want them to burn, they should look slightly golden on top.
  • Let cool for ten minutes (The least amount of time you could possibly wait without burning your tongue) and enjoy. I personally love to cut them open and add a slab of soy free earth balance butter to the middle. NOMNOMNOM.
  • After they’ve completely cooled, store in the fridge for up to a week. These have no preservatives, so they shouldn’t be left out. (I personally really enjoy them cold. I find these muffins are moist enough to convert to a beautiful texture when cooled.)

So that’s it! I hope you like this recipe, and if you make it, be sure take a picture and tag me on Instagram @KaitlynGGuay

Happy Baking!

The Foda

Nature, I Reclaim You

“Nature, I Reclaim You”

Nature. I reclaim you.

I reclaim your sweet smelling grasses, your sappy stalks.

I reclaim your golden, radiant warmth, and cool, refreshing breath.

I reclaim the musky scent of earth beneath my feet, the balm of your salty oceans.

I reclaim it all, all your majesty, majesty I have quaked from in fear of one life-altering parasite, the one that stole my health without so much as a thank you, and left me bereft in the dark.

Too long have I let fear keep me from your life-giving beauty.

Too long have I denied myself the restorative serenity of your face.

Today, I reclaim this right.

I will be incarcerated no more.

I will feel your life on my face.

I will let your breezes fan my skin.

I will imbibe the ancient and breathtaking beauty that is you.

Nature. I reclaim you.

…..Bug spray. You’ll come too.

“Will Power Hour”

Will Power Hour

Today’s Words of Wisdom:

“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.”

~Mahatma Gandhi

The Foda’s Take: Gandhi, man! A gift to the world that just keeps on giving. For example, today he taught me a new word. Indomitable: Impossible to subdue or defeat. Which may have prompted a moment where I went to brush my hair and yelled at the baby-fine locks at my temples: “You cowlicks are indomitable!” But I digress.

Good morrow, fine people! Today we shall dissect… <drum roll, please>…..

Will power. Not to be, ahem, conceited or anything, but I’ve got it. I’ve had to have it. As anyone with a chronic illness knows, you have to commit yourself one hundred percent to doing everything within your power to get well, no matter how unpleasant. Like drinking activated charcoal. (Which– for those of you who don’t know– tastes, I’d imagine, very similar to bantha fodder.)

So with such a plethora of finely honed will power at my disposal, you can imagine how frustrated I can get when– like yesterday– my brain is set on GO-GO-GO but my body is lying prone on the couch, stubbornly refusing to move its “feels-like-they-weigh-ten-thousand-pounds” limbs. Which naturally spurred me into a state of “AAARRRGGGGGG!!!!” all Charlie Brown fumbling-the-football style.

But then today I woke up. (Yes, I’m being both literal and figurative.) Because as I shuffled to make my morning breakfast, body already feeling like the tin man rusted over, it suddenly dawned on me. Why have I only ever correlated will power with my physical accomplishments? Why not use my abundance of will to empower my brain? And why did that thought bring dread to my very soul?

Which is when “Legally Blonde” Elle Woods popped into my brain and quipped: “What, like it’s hard?” Um… YEAH.

Oh, yes. I’m talking about MINDFULNESS, people. That old nugget.

So this week I’ve decided to incorporate a practice my mother– referred to in this galaxy as Professor Momgonagall— calls “power hour.” It’s something she does once a week with the sole purpose of accomplishing all those annoying “I don’t wanna do it but I have to” kind of tasks. Like the annual cleaning of their basement, where my parents graciously store items for us that won’t fit in our tiny place. (This is significant, because in addition to being allergic to pollen, dander, and dust, my mother is also deathly allergic to clutter. And yet she routinely consents to storing my larger seasonal goods. Which this year prompted the making of an adorable video wherein she displayed my things all Vanna White style to see what I’d like to keep.)

Only the mind can’t just be trained once a week. It needs daily attention. (Needy noggin!) So instead of one power hour per week, I’m going to try logging 10 power minutes per day. Then 15. Then 20. My theory is that with time, I will eventually be able to live mindfully throughout the day.

You see, all the will power in the world is not going to get me better faster. I’m already doing everything I can to heal my physical form. But the mind… that I can work on. So here goes. Power up, people!

Activating Cranial Thrusters,

The Foda

Once Upon a Lyme: Animated Children’s Book

Hi, everyone!

I’m overwhelmed with how well my animated children’s book “Once Upon a Lyme” is doing! Today, a doctor in Virginia reached out to me and asked for a version of the video without the added author’s note feature I included in the original. I was more than happy to comply, and wanted to post the remastered version here. This is just the children’s book. Please feel free to share it with your schools, family, friends, school districts, and any other organization where children mingle and mix and play.

Cheers,

The Foda

“Finding the Flow”

“Finding the Flow”

Today’s Words of Wisdom:

“The sword is like a bird. If you clutch it too tightly, you choke it. Too lightly, and it flies away.”

~ “Scaramouche”, Perigore of Paris

The Foda’s Take: I guess that’s why they call it a “happy” medium. Because in this scenario… well, overcompensate and you’ve got yourself a dead bird.

The year was 1997. I was in junior high, and it was a cold winter night. My father, known in this galaxy by his alias Dobiwan, was standing in front of our ridiculously antiquated microwave, finger hovering over the timer button. We were watching “Scaramouche,” a 1952 film starring Stewart Granger and Janet Leigh. It was toward the end of the movie, right before the protagonist and antagonist were about to engage in an epic fencing duel, the length and intricacy of which made it the longest dueling sequence to date. And we were going to time it. (To my recollection, it clocked in at around 7 minutes.)

This movie was one of my childhood favorites, and I remember well the advice delivered by fencing master Perigore: “The sword is like a bird. If you clutch it too tightly, you choke it. Too lightly, and it flies away.” (It’s actually stolen from 19th century French fencer Louis Justin Lafaugere.) Great advice, right? It applies to pretty much everything. Relationships. Running a business. Holding a spoon.

So then why did it take me so long to realize that “muscling through” a tough time was, how shall I put this…. STUPID??!!

You see, I’ve recently started a new protocol for my chronic Lyme disease. It’s part of a new study combining three drugs, and they were super upfront with me. IT. IS. INTENSE. Like, “people calling in crying because they feel so awful” intense. (It’s a “feel bad to feel better” kind of situation. Like chemo. Or getting your teeth cleaned. Or doing lunges.) So in the days leading up to beginning this treatment, I was in preparation mode. Stock the fridge with easy meals. Load the Netflix queue. Take care of all important business, bills, and paperwork I’ve been avoiding. I’m not going to lie, it was very much a “last supper” kind of mentality I had going on.

Which I may have mentioned to my father Dobiwan the day before beginning the treatment, stating I just had to “muscle through it.”

To which my wise and learned father replied: “Or flow through it….”

<Picture a light bulb popping up over my head and rapping my skull repeatedly, yelling, “Ding-ding-ding!”>

Yes. In this scenario my light bulb is talking. (Shut up. It’s my imagination.) Why was the light bulb blatantly shaming me? Because I’ve worked really hard over the past four years to better myself, my mind, and my spirit while my body deteriorated. And learning how to relinquish what isn’t mine to control and approach each day with a flexible and mindful spirit was one of the first big lessons I learned. But some lessons you need to learn more than once. (Or twice. Or… a lot.)

When life gives you a traumatic situation, most people’s tendency is to try and gain control over it, kind of like a burly bodybuilder at an arm-wrestling match. Problem is, trying to arm-wrestle life is kind of like– how shall I say it– a premature baby trying to drop kick the heavyweight champ. Alternately, we also can’t sit back and throw our hands up, relying on fate or time to do the work for us. That’s called letting your life pass you by.

So as I embark on this new path, I’m reminded once more to channel the strength and intelligence of water: Strong enough to erode any obstacle over time, and yet smart enough to flow around the jutting rock instead of fruitlessly trying to knock it down.

Or as we kids used to say back in the 90’s…

Go with the flow, yo!

<Swwwwiiiiiiishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!>

The Foda

Once Upon a Lyme: Animated Video

Howdy, folks!

It’s the beginning of May, which is Lyme Disease Awareness month. Last year I created and put out an educative children’s flipbook to help teach kids what to look for and how to stay safe while doing what kids are meant to do… play outside! This year, I took it a step further and created an animated video. Please share this with as many people as you can, and get the message out so hopefully the 300,000 new cases of Lyme reported annually in the U.S. will become far less! Knowledge is power!!!

 

 

Download a PDF of the book for free here.

Check out the links below for more information:

General Information can be found at the link below, including best safety practices, where ticks like to roam, how to remove a tick, protect your property, and even your pets.

www.StopTicks.org/prevention

Think you may have Lyme? This fabulous book by Lyme expert Dr. Richard Horowitz “Why Canʼt I Get Better?” provides all the information and scientific research youʼd ever need.

Get Dr. Horowitz’s book here.

For those already with dealing with Lyme, check out the positive and integrative website “Lyme Less, Live More,”designed to help you overcome chronic illness so you can, as the name suggests, Lyme less, live more!

I hope you enjoyed this video! Please don’t forget to share!

Cheers,

The Foda

Long Live the Misfits

Long Live the Misfits

 I didn’t want to tell this story. This story is sad and unjust. It’s teeming with discrimination and humiliation and I’ve tried for the past week to find the words. I wanted them to be poignant, yet light. Personal, yet above it all. Victorious. Poetic. I failed. 

The truth is, last week I paid $100 dollars to go to a mandated workshop on how to prevent bullying and discrimination in NY schools. It was the last requirement I needed to obtain my masters– something I’d had to fight to finish once I became too ill to travel to campus. I called ahead, letting the instructor know that I was ill and that walking or moving around was very difficult for me. “Being a teacher myself,” I explained, “I know that many ice-breaker activities involve movement. So I wanted to give you a head’s up.” My assurance? “No one’s going to make you stand up if you don’t want to,” the woman laughed. I was led to believe it wouldn’t be an issue.

A week later, I was sitting in a conference room with forty other people, listening to this woman speaking about the perils of discrimination and bullying: about the eleven protected classes, one of which is people with disabilities. Then she asked everyone to stand up. I hobbled over and discretely reminded her of my limitations. She told me to sit back down, and announced over the microphone that people should come talk to me. Humiliated at being singled out, I sat, breathing a sigh of relief when it was over and everyone returned to their seats.

…Until twenty minutes later when she instructed everyone to stand and move to the open space on the other side of the room. I locked eyes with her, and she waved me off, as if to say, “you just sit.” That’s when I realized that even though I called ahead, even though any good teacher would have taken this information and tweaked their presentation so that everyone could be included, her version of “accommodating” me was to have me just watch everyone else. She drew a line in the sand: able-bodied, and not. And I was the only one on the other side. Ostracized. Humiliated. Marginalized.

Forty pairs of healthy eyes drilled into me, wondering, “why is she sitting? What’s going on?” A curious woman asked, “Oh, are you not with us?” I mumbled something, mortified. After several exercises, the instructor had them do an activity where they all made a long line. Which they made. Facing me. Staring at me. Cementing every fear, every piece of personal shame I’d ever had to quell since getting sick: that in a world of normal, healthy people, they were on one side. And I was the freak on the other.

I stared at my pen, too humiliated and too furious to do anything else. The irony that I was paying to have this woman teach me how not to marginalize people with disabilities was not lost on me. I got my certificate and waited until I was in the car with my husband to cry.

I have tried to write this story many times. To share with people that just because someone looks normal doesn’t mean you know their story. That disabilities don’t just come in the form of wheelchairs and visible impediments. That just because someone is an adult doesn’t mean that ostracizing them based on physical ability won’t be just as scarring.

This happened a week ago. I’m not going to pretend it won’t bother me for a long time to come. But one day soon, I will wake up, and realize I’m still here. Still breathing, still living; I survived this humiliation. And I’ll give up the shame, toss it aside like a tissue. For I know in my heart just how much I have to give. Just how much I am worth. After all, most anyone can walk about on their healthy two legs. But I know a truth they do not: of the value that’s found on the other side of “have-not.” Of “surmount-this.” Of freak. Of misfit. And a smile will steal my lips as I realize my strength; a strength that surpasses having two workable legs, and will live on long after that instructor’s body withers with age until it’s crippled like mine. She will have none of the tools. And I will be fine.

So to the woman who did this: I see your humiliation and I raise you fifty years. Until then, I declare: Here’s to all the freaks breaking the mold. Long live the misfits. 

Freak out,

The Foda

*For all my readers with Lyme Disease, I welcome you to join my Google + community: “Lyme Disease: A New Hope.”